The waiting is the hardest part

It’s been a few weeks since last posted on the progress on my knee. In that time, much is different and much is the same. On the different side, I am moving around much better, thanks to increased strength in the knee, calf and quadriceps and getting 35 degrees of motion in the knee brace. Daily living activities are going much, much better (bathing, getting dressed, being at work, etc.) Pain is pretty much non-existent. The knee feels more stiff than anything most days. The strongest medication I ever take is Advil, and that’s only once a week or so. The most pain I have is when doing the daily leg lifts to strengthen the quadriceps muscles. I also need just a single crutch to get around, and can go up and down stairs without crutches by just hanging on to the handrail.

In the “what is the same” category, I still have on the brace. I am still not driving. I still get plenty of odd looks at work or at my drop-off points for rides to and from work. And lots of comments about “must be cool to wear shorts” when they see me in my dress shorts at work (the dress code at work is “business casual,” which means jeans and collared shirt). Yes, it is SO worth it to tear the patellar tendon to be able to wear shorts to work. I appreciate the sentiment from people who make this comment, but it did get old after the first 10 times I heard it.

I don’t really have an overarching theme or point for this post, just a lot of thoughts going on in my head. So instead of a cohesive thesis, you get bullet points.

• I have a much greater appreciation for handicap ramps/curb cuts, doors, and bathroom stalls. When you don’t have the use of one of your legs, these things are godsends. It’s a VERY good idea for new buildings, parking lots and bathrooms have these things. And a note to everyone: DON’T use the handicap bathroom (proper name is Disabled-Access) stall (that’s the oversized one with the handrails) unless every other stall is taken. You may like the additional room in the stall. But leave it open for the person who might walk in whose ONLY option for going to the bathroom is the larger stall. There have been several days at work when I have had to go to 3 or 4 separate floors to use the bathroom due to the Disable-Access stall being occupied.
• If you wonder how I got hurt, it was very similar to what happened when Garrett Richards of the LA Angels got hurt in 2014. His story is here. The injury is about 2:30 in. Don't watch if you are squeamish about injuries.
• It is not possible to over-communicate with a friend or relative who is struggling with health issues. Every time someone has provided a word of encouragement, phone call or email, it has come at just the right time. When you have health issues, it can feel as if the rest of the world continues on while you are sidelined to some extent. Thanks for everyone reading this who has helped me out with encouragement over the last month and a-half. If you’re wondering whether the card, phone call or just kind word means something to that person or persons in your life who are struggling with health issues, don’t wonder. It impacts their life, whether or not they express appreciation for it.
• Progress is happening, but patience is needed. Day-to-day, progress with my knee can be hard to see. But if I look back one week, or 2 weeks or to the day after surgery, the progress is significant. This has been the most difficult thing to deal with, as I would just like to be able to do things like drive, mow the lawn, walk the dog or play catch with Benjamin tomorrow. I know all of those things eventually will (hopefully) happen, but it’s hard to keep the focus on both the end goal and the day today.

Patience to Persist

I’ve always thought I was a patient person. But God has shown me how wrong I was in that self-assessment based on my own pride. I was confusing my ability to be flexible and/or tolerate waiting on things with patience. There is a difference between patience (in knowing that tribulation is to our benefit, in that it ultimately gives us hope) and merely tolerating the current situation. Romans 5:3-5 says:


And not only so, but we glory in tribulations also: knowing that tribulation worketh patience
And patience, experience; and experience, hope
And hope maketh not ashamed; because the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Ghost which is given unto us.”

True patience (as described by Paul) works (leads to) experience, which gives us hope. In my own life, having this knee injury has given me hope in several areas. In the physical sense, I have hope of returning to my former physical activities (minus baseball and basketball) and appreciating the gift of those activities. In the spiritual, I look forward to the day when we receive our glorified bodies (as described in I Corinthians 15:42-53, Phil. 3:21, and elsewhere).